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Coasting-Fiction by Kenneth James Crist
Death Orchid-Fiction by j. brooke
Orange Bikini-Fiction by Maria Espinosa
Sirens-Fiction by Jason Bougger
Death Takes a Snow Day-Fiction by Cindy Rosmus
The Chill of a Lifetime-Fiction by Robert Aguon Perez
HIJAX-Fiction by Liz McAdams
Marriage-Fiction by Doug Hawley
Secrets-Fiction by Carole Sojka
The Ten Ten-Fiction by A. F. Knott
Losing Eileen-Fiction by Marci McKim
Snake Dog-Fiction by Catfish McDaris
My Heart Will Always Be Yours-Fiction by Jon Park
Unicorn-Fiction by Rob Dominelli
Call Girls-Flash Fiction by Gay Degani
Hollywood Harry's bar and Grill-Flash Fiction by Fred Zackel
Grandmother Nightmare-Flash Fiction by Rick McQuiston
Death Row-Flash Fiction by Luann Lewis
The Jarvis and Mae Team-Flash Fiction by Paul Beckman
Flying Away-Flash Fiction by Jerry Vilhotti
A Note for Alex Gildzen-Poem by Mark Young
Spoiled-Poem by Chad Haskins
Recognized-Poem by Michael Keshigian
the only goodbye he deserved-Poem by J. J. Campbell
Dropping the Ball-Poem by Ian Mullins
A Song of Vengeance-Poem by Christopher Hivner
A Slip of the Tongue-Poem by Robert Halleck
Again the 11th Hour-Poem by Robert Halleck
Jack-Poem by Judith Partin-Nielsen
singles ad Westwood Magazine-Poem by Judith Partin-Nielsen
Love is all-Poem by Meg Baird
Travelling-Poem by Meg Baird
Roxyanna-Poem by David Spicer
Wanted-Poem by David Spicer
Whataya Say?-Poem by David Spicer
Cartoons by Cartwright
Hail, Tiger!
Angel of Manslaughter
The Gazing Ball
Strange Gardens
Gutter Balls
Calpurnia's Window
No Place Like Home
Dark Tales from Gent's Pens

Art by Noelle Richardson 2018



by Maria Espinosa




He was a tall and handsome man. His voice was mellifluous as he talked about  vibrations of energy and chakra balancing as well as the benefits of a regular yoga practice.  In the pulpit of the Methodist Church in a prim San Francisco neighborhood (rented for the occasion by the East-West Meditation Center, which still lacked a home base) he spoke for forty minutes, after which he strummed on his guitar, sang a khirtan, and asked the audience to join. “Sri ram, jai ram, jai ram ram om,” Marcia sang, along with the rest of the audience, comprised mostly of women.

Afterwards she came up to him, dressed in her new turquoise summer dress with the tight-fitting bodice and low neckline, and she asked where she might study yoga. Did he give classes?  No, he said, not yet, although that was in the offing. But he did teach privately.

The next day she showed up at his apartment.  Because she had just been fired from her last job, she had free time.  What would she wear for the lesson?  Her unflattering shorts?  Leotard tights?  It was June, and the day was hot and sunny. She decided on her bikini.  It was a soft shade of orange. Later, when she entered his apartment, she saw that the loincloth he wore was the same shade. What a coincidence! They were attuned on some level, she decided.  And how well muscled he was. Even more handsome with fewer clothes—as she, too, was also more attractive scantily clad. Thank God for her firm body.  At twenty-five, she religiously practiced her modern dance exercises each morning.  They had helped her through child birth and now they helped keep her limber, keep her slender despite the heavy commute driving and work schedule she’d had until last week.

She felt blissfully unconcerned about the firing. Unemployment would kick in!  Vacation time! Her baby daughter at the sitter’s, a saintly woman who took Carmelita in at 6:00 a.m. and sometimes even kept her overnight when Marcia would be out late or entertaining a lover.

It was 1965. Free love. The Pill. “Let’s do it in the road,” sang the Beatles. Marcia had many lovers, after evenings of parties which featured brown rice and marijuana. Or the No Name Bar in Sausalito, which she thought of as her own special private club.  There she might weep on a stranger’s shoulder—and after a while they all knew each other more or less, the black sheep who received monthly remittances from families hoping to keep them at bay, the artists, the semi-legal French immigrants, the small-time and big-time drug dealers, the attorneys who considered themselves creative or laid back or liberal.  There she could sip Irish coffees (usually some kind stranger would end up footing the bill) and talk with her friends, which included a few women who were adrift like her.  Mimi, the charming New Orleans tarot reader was one.  Adriana, from Cuba, sincere, searching, disillusioned with the Church, was another.  Then there was Joyce, who claimed that she had gone home with a different man each night…until she found The One.

          Now Marcia had free time.  And she planned to enjoy it.

          His apartment was somewhat luxurious with its rich deep blue carpet, its beige sofas, and a tiger skin rug from India. Translucent white curtains fluttered in the breeze which blew through opened windows. Light traffic sounded from Clement Street below.

A polished antique dining table and sideboard in an alcove off the living room.  His bedroom, with its large bed, a purple satin comforter.  The sunny kitchen. The bathroom with its small black and white tiles of decades ago, and a lingering scent of incense.

          In the bedroom – door closed for privacy—she slipped off her dress and underwear, put on her bikini, and then stepped barefoot into the living room. He, too, was barefoot, in his orange loin cloth.  Around his upper right arm he wore thick metal coils of gold, silver, and copper.

          Let us begin, he said.

          He started with the Tree Pose and took her through some basic asanas. She was thrilled.  This was her very first exposure to yoga, and in 1965 it was still considered somewhat exotic.

          How limber you are, he said.  His azure blue eyes beamed approval.

          She asked about his arm bracelets.

          They are protective, he said. Yogananda suggested that I wear them.

Yogananda was his guru, his guide. Yogananda, he said, had given direction and blessing and purpose to his life.

          Afterwards they sat silently in meditation, he on the tiger skin, and she on the carpet.  Then he made her breakfast of chappatis, Indian wheatcakes, which he flipped skillfully in a frying pan. I use only ghee or clarified butter, he said.

She had brought him an offering of canned pineapple juice.  He regarded it with contempt. Canned, he said. I never eat anything out of cans. 

His parents, he said, paid for the apartment, and in return, they came to stay overnight once or twice a month. They lived in the south bay in Atherton. His father was a retired oil executive, and he himself was a monk. He had taken vows of abstinence, at Yogananda’s urging.

After breakfast, he asked if she would massage his shoulders, which had been stiff lately. 

How smooth his skin felt beneath her fingers.

Sex, he said, diverts the energy flow. With kriya—a technique I will show you when you are ready—the energy flows upwards from the lower chakras, and sexual energy is transformed, alchemized.

And yet how smooth he felt beneath her fingers.

And after she had massaged his shoulders, his neck, his upper arms, he drew her to him and kissed her lightly on the lips.

Of course, after several yoga sessions, they ended up in his bed.

Sometimes, he said, it is better to release sexual energy.  Frustration and inhibition can create harm within the body.

But he was still a monk.

          His parents were coming to visit, he announced one afternoon after a tryst in bed. You must leave.  She was tempted to drop a few bobby pins on the floor of the guest bathroom, leave her panties wedged beneath the sofa cushions.  Yet she simply left, taking with her all traces of her presence, leaving nothing behind except for a faint aroma of Jean Nate.

Maria Espinosa managed to get expelled from Harvard, and has lived  most of her life in the San Francisco Bay Area. A recent transplant to New Mexico, she feels that her roots are finally beginning to penetrate the hard, dry desert earth. Maria has published two several award-winning novels. They include Longing, Dying Unfinished, Incognito: Journey of a Secret Jew, and an earlier novel, of which she rarely speaks, Dark Plums, about a Manhattan prostitute. Since then, she has completed another novel, not yet published, and has begun a sixth. Website: www.mariaespinosa.com

In Association with Black Petals & Fossil Publications 2017