Black Petals Issue #104, Summer 2023

Editor's Page
BP Artists and Illustrators
Mars-News, Views and Commentary
A Question of Money: Fiction by Eric Burbridge
Behold, a White Horse; Fiction by Spencer Jepma
Crawling Flesh: Fiction by Michael Stoll
Elm Weaver: N. G. Leonetti
Hunger: Fiction by Mark Jabaut
Mr. Fuzzypants: Fiction by Paul Radcliffe
Stop the World: Fiction by Roy Dorman
The Road Less Taken: Fiction by Albert N. Katz
The Washer Woman: Fiction by Sophia Wiseman-Rose
Underneath the Sheet: Fiction by Hillary Lyon
Shining Up Grandma: Fiction by Kenneth James Crist
The Children of 666 Middle School: Flash Fiction by M. L. Fortier
Bleed: Flash Fiction by Liam Spinage
Good Times: Flash Fiction by Ronin Fox
Time Lost: Flash Fiction by Bruce Costello
Unhappy Shadow: Flash Fiction by Paul Radcliffe
Cemetery Road: Poem by Joseph V. Danoski
Chasing Desolation: Poem by Joseph V. Danoski
Detroit Jurassic: Poem by Joseph V. Donaski
Colonia Somnia: Poem by Bianca Alu-Marr
The Precipice: Poem by Bianca Alu-Marr
Dread: Poem by LindaAnn LoSchiavo
Home Movies: Poem by Christopher Hivner
Peppermint Twist: Poem by Christopher Hivner
There's Always Tomorrow Night: Poem by Christopher Hivner
Joke: Poem by DJ Tyrer
Ceramic Duck: Poem by Pete Mladinic
Choice: Poem by Pete Mladinic
To Stop the Killing: Poem by Pete Mladinic
Reaper: Poem by David Barber

Christopher Hivner: Home Movies

Home Movies


Christopher Hivner




Sit down everyone,

I'm starting the video.

Everyone comfortable?


So the video starts

right at the action

because dad was late.

There are my mother's spread legs,

nice shot dad, great camera work,

anyway as you can see

mom is exhausted

because I'm having trouble

slipping out.

There, she's pushing again

and yes

she just called my father

an asshole and a fucknut.

Now, here is where

you first see my head.

Yes, Jerry, it is very large,

and misshapen, 

thank you for pointing it out,

now please shut up.

Mom gives one last push

and I pop out

into the doctor's hands.

As you can see by the look on his face

he's horrified by

the red lumps on my skin,

the superfluous tongue

growing from my upper lip,

the one-nostriled nose,

and my shlong

that he initially thought

was the umbilical cord.

After he cuts the real cord

I catch a glimpse of myself

in a mirror

and realize immediately I am grotesque

which pisses me off.

I mean, I'm a minute old

and already know that life

is going to shit on me

like a thundercloud

of diarrhea.

Oh, yes, here is where I leap

from the doctor's arms

onto my mother.

Of course I couldn't talk yet

but internally I was screaming

"Did you fuck a badger? What happened to me?"

My hands were tiny 

but I did some real damage

to her face before the doctor

pulled me off.

That's when I saw my idiot father.

Dear old dad

was still filming while yelling

"Holy shit what is it?"

What is it?

I'm your son you piece of . . .

Jerry, get off of me,

I know I'm upset

but you're not helping.

I'm fine, I'm fine,

just watch the video.

It gets shaky here

because I've slid down

the doctor's leg and grabbed

onto my dad's balls.

That's him screaming.

Annnnnd there goes the camera

onto the floor. 

What you’re seeing now is the far wall

of the room.

Both parents are bellowing

while the doctor tries in vain

to scoop me up.

Eventually a nurse sedated me

but not before I made sure

dad wouldn’t have any more children.

That’s the story of my birth

which was traumatic,

but today the ugly duckling

has become a swan.

Yes Jerry, I mean I grew up

to be beautiful,

you asshole.



Christopher Hivner calls south central Pennsylvania in the United States home. He writes short stories (mostly horror and humor) and poetry (speculative and non-speculative) His most recent book is Dark Oceans of Divinity (horror/dark fantasy poems) (

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