Phil, the Chosen One

by Nicholas De Marino

A devout catholic vampire, father of three, and dismemberer of thirteen, Phil was the A.I.'s choice to plead humanity's case. But the day before arbitration, his execution went ahead as scheduled — convicted murderers and would-be saviors are still convicted murderers, after all. For his last meal, Phil ordered a new pair of Jordans, laced them up, and began to eat himself, feet first. Our hopes and his body disappeared, bite by bite. No ouroboros, the improbably flexible maniac disappeared with a BLARP! The primed warheads, like the empty electric chair, shuffled awkwardly. The rest of us shrugged and resumed doomscrolling.

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Nicholas De Marino is a neurodivergent writer and poet. He founded 5enses and is a foofaraw columnistand Codex member. He's got several writing credits, degrees, and accolades that have nothing to do with cats. Plus some that do. Read more at nicholasdemarino.com.